Another batch of people just got accepted to my dream school, with most of them having interviewed early in the cycle like I did (October/November) so I guess they're still sitting on a lot of applications. Prior to this group of acceptances, the school had only given out ~1/3 of the spots it would offer this cycle. I'm not sure how many were offered this past week but it seems like there's still a large chunk of people that will be accepted. At least that's the expectation. And hearing that people who interviewed early are still being reviewed and accepted gives me some hope, albeit very little of it.
I'm in this weird head space right now where I'm convinced that I will have to reapply next cycle but at the same time I can't believe that I won't get in. It's like one part of me is rooted in the reality of the situation but there's still the dreamer that's holding out hope.
Also, I've been feeling very down lately because I recently realized that nothing good has happened to me in well over a year. This is not to say that my life has been crappy, because it hasn't been like that for the most part. It's just that all the things I'd planned for myself as a reward/pleasure have backfired mightily and none of the things that have occurred spontaneously in my life have been good. So overall I'm situated at the negative end of the spectrum of happiness and it kind of sucks.
With this recent realization regarding my state of being, it's very hard to comprehend that good news will come to my door (or inbox) with regards to medical school admissions. If I do get accepted to the dream school, it'll be a very pleasant surprise because I'm setting myself up for epic failure.
If you set your expectations low, you'll never be disappointed. Or so they say.
